a gift to both the receiver and giver. This holiday season I got a phone call from a stranger.   Now didn’t I have enough to do already with all the students, graduates and my own family members?  But I paused, I listened, THAT IS WHAT WE DO AT HORIZONS4GIRLS and I responded. This mom, new to the area had gotten my phone number from someone who knew what kind of work I was doing. She had just left an unbearable situation,  was homeless,  and because of her toddler’s unique needs was having challenges finding housing.  It was just a few days till Christmas, and the toddler’s birthday was also just a day or two away.  Wow!! Do I turn away from her needs or add to my list of what needs to be done?  Well, I paused!  I invited her into my home, open up a closet door, pulled out a spare winter coat, a couple warm blankets, and my husband opened his wallet and gave her gas money for a job she had just gotten. I gave her some phone numbers for community resources and …….It worked! They found an apartment,  a simple Christmas tree, a Christmas gift AND a simple birthday gift.  This family has settled in to a safe, warm and welcoming home.  She sends me photos and regular updates of how they are doing.  That pause….an interruption, or is it a gift 🎁. You decide.

A skill I taught for MANY years…..sales.  We have all heard about the sales person that could sell ice cubes to an eskimo.  And, how many of us remember trying to convince mom about that bike we wanted for Christmas, so that we could run errands for her or the video game we wanted for our birthday that we told mom would improve a test score at school.

What talent were we using to sell our case to mom or our products to our potential customers.  We were LISTENING very closely for those triggers.   Well, guess what? That is what our mentors are doing as they work with students at Horizons4Girls.

I don’t tell a student their counselor says they need to complete the assignments on time. I am listening…..listening closely. I am getting to know that student.  And, I am NOT that slick used car salesperson trying to sell a car.   I want to get to know that student.   We might go on field trips, take an art class at the Art Center, or go to a concert at the theater together.

I am sincere and paying attention, I might ask a question or two or I might share a story about something I discovered. We might do a service project together or enjoy some time together in the kitchen.

Those relationships are priceless, but they have boundaries.   You share what boundaries you have and the student shares any boundaries they might have.  There is a mutual respect being built between the two of you.

As you get to know that student you might learn of an interest they have or a goal they have.  As you get to know each other you are able to weave into what the student might like to accomplish into how good communication might help them get to that goal or how the logic of investing time into learning a new skill will help them more quickly get that car they’ve been dreaming of.

Find out more of how we mentor in Mentoring Relationships,  Just Talk to Me. Get your copy  Available now at your favorite digital store!

12+ years ago a good friend said to me, you need to have a dog with you for the work you do.   Deb was a breeder of Teddy Bears, a designer breed, Shitzu and Bichon Frise, 50/50.  She had recently bred her female and had a female pup ready to be adopted. That is how FAITH came to be with Horizons4Girls.

A Facebook friend of mine has a nationally recognized small therapy dog, Gizmo that worked with her in the school system in Connecticut and she and I immediately had some extended discussions. I did my research and Faith and I began our journey of training together.

Faith became a certified therapy dog and then became certified in advanced therapy to work with me with the ‘at risk’ students of Horizons4Girls.

Now for those of you that are pet owners …..how many times have you wondered what your pet — dog…cat…or whatever is thinking?  Well, they are watching you for clues on what YOU are thinking too.  The trick is to learn to read that stream of communication.

Faith is an angel that works side by side with me every day.  She can put a new student at ease.  As the group gathers in our classroom, Faith will scan the room, the mentors and the students.  She will walk up to someone experiencing an issue and sit at their feet until invited up into a person’s lap.  Her message seems to be, I’m here for you.

Faith will go with us on field trips, and with me to public presentations and coffee shop meetings with donors, parents and volunteers.  She is the attention grabber as I enter a room, a great opening opportunity for me to have those conversations with donors, potential volunteers and students.

One of her favorite activities is her library visits.  We visit libraries and young fresh new readers read to Faith from a favorite book.  H4G students are involved as a favorite craft activity is creating bookmarks that are given to these new readers…….FULL CIRCLE — A LOVE OF READING HAS BEGUN!

Get you copy today of Mentoring Relationships,  Just Talk to Me and find out more of how Faith impacts those mentoring relationships.